Stay at Home .... Wife?

(Written February 7th)

I'm telling you, it's not all it's cracked up to be.

So I graduated and we knew we wanted to have kids asap and I didn't want to get a teaching position for half the year if I was going to be pregnant and puking my guts out. This is a really hard thing to explain to people because it's none of their business and also because getting pregnant is not something you can plan on. You can hope for it. You can pray for it. But you can't count on it working out when and how you want.

Once the new year started, I started looking for other kinds of jobs. Jobs that could work for just as long as I needed them. I got a job I really love (still in the education field) but with very few hours. And I felt bad that I wasn't using my time as efficiently as I have been for the last 4 years.I felt bad that I was hardly contributing to our family of two.

But then I was sick. So so sick. A sickness that no one can empathize with besides women who have already been pregnant. I thought I had braced myself for this self inflicted torture but no one is truly prepared for it. I couldn't shower anymore. I had to take baths because standing for ten minutes took too much energy. If I did shower, Ty had to help me wash my hair. It's an absolute blur of my bed, the couch, nausea, heartburn, saltines, ginger ales, and changing into clean sweats. I felt bad that the house was dirty, that I never made dinner and that my personal hygiene flew out the window. And here I had all the time in the world and nothing to show for it except for a flat stomach and a positive pregnancy test.

But now, at 13 weeks, I feel so much better. I can eat full meals. I can shower again. I can go to the grocery store without completely crashing afterwards.  I can do the laundry. I can make dinner. I 'm actually gaining weight and getting a little tummy. I feel one thousand times better and I'm appreciating the time that I get to spend at home with Ty.

We are so excited to meet our little nugget come August but we are enjoying the journey on our way. Not a lot of people get this luxury so I'll embrace it while I can.

Husbandisms #whatever

(Written January 14)

So clearly having this baby brings about a lot of discussion.... Like the following-

T: I can't wait for this baby to come out.
E: You know once it's out, we'll never be alone again.
T: well that's true but that's okay. It's a baby!
E: I don't know if we've really thought about this. I mean, sure, I want a baby but when have you ever wanted an eight year old?
T: Never.

T: (singing to the baby) Baby beluga, swimming...
E: ... In the amniotic fluid
T: Is that really the song?
E: What?
T: Oh I know, it's Ray Charles.

E: So you know by week 20 the baby can hear music. You know what that means?
T: What?
E: We'll have to stop listening to Ke$ha
T: But don't you want our baby to be cultured!

First Appointment :)

(Written January 7th)

We had our first appointment on January 7th and I was approximately 9 weeks along. It was very exciting because it was our very first appointment. The doctor put all my fears at ease (especially the kidney stone panic) and answered all of our questions. There are 6 doctors in the practice and I have to see all of them before I deliver because any of them could deliver our babe. I'm hoping that it's this doctor that delivers because he was great but I'm sure I'll like the others too.

The best part though was at the end of our appointment. He said, "Well we're not busy and I don't think anyone's in the room right now so we could do a quick ultrasound if you'd like." Uh. Yes please.

{I know it doesn't look like much but we're sure smitten. The head is on the right, little leg nubs on the left and on the bottom pic the dark spot in the middle is the heart.}

So we got to see an ultrasound of our little jelly bean! We weren't expecting it at all and it was amazing to witness the little heart beating so so fast. I didn't cry, but I almost did. As usual. The nurse told us that once we see the heart beat, there's less than a 5% chance of miscarriage which is extremely comforting. It has definitely been the best part of this pregnancy thus far.

Grajumucation

As of this Friday, December 14th, I will be officially graduated. (Yes, I still get to walk in April) BUT I have done everything that I need to do to say that I have a  Bachelor of Science degree in Mathematics Education. 

ooh. Fancy. 

The last two weeks of student teaching was pure torture on account of the fact that I was burnt out on the whole not getting paid bit. The whole no-finals thing is kind of making up for that. I did have a few .. interesting moments to end that part of my life. 

1. The most awkward of them all. I had a student who really liked me. A male student who really really liked me. To the point that he noticed when I wore new clothes and complimented my hair. (This just makes him  sound gay... I'm trying to emphasize how much attention he paid me but it's not working.) Driving to school on our very last day, I told Jenepher (my teaching partner), "I hope no one tries to hug me. And by 'no one,' I mean 'Sam*'." And try he did. I dismissed the class, everyone leaves. I lean against the counter and turn my head to the back desk to talk to Jen. Then I hear, "Mrs. Gardner" extremely close to me. I turn my head and there he is, with his arms half way around me and about 8 inches from my face. In response, I gradually move my arm up, so as not to touch him (HE WAS THAT CLOSE!) and I go, "High Five!" I hope I never see him again anywhere. 

2. This one was hilarious. I misplaced my calculator which looks exactly like the school calculators so I asked all my students to check their calculators to see if it got mixed up in theirs. I approach two little guys and one of them has the same calculator. I ask him if he checked it and then remembered it was his personal calculator and had his name and phone number in it. So he holds up his calculator so his number is showing and goes, "Take a good look Mrs. Gardner." To which I respond, "Blake*! I'm a married woman!" Him and his little friend were in giggles for the next five minutes. I kid you not. Literally five minutes. I asked them if they were still laughing after those five minutes and the other one goes, "It was SOOO funny!" 

3. This one happened with the twin boys I tutor. One of them was asking me a question but wasn't wording it very well. I told him the answer depended on how he was thinking about it. He said, "Well I'm thinking about it like a 13 year old boy so how am I thinking about it?" I responded, "I have no clue. I've never been one of those." They both burst out laughing and the other twin said, "That's the second funniest thing we've heard all day!" I want to know what the first is. 

If we're to learn anything from these stories, it's that my niche in the humor department is at Junior High boy level? And that I'm happy to be graduated and a little scared of what comes next. Also, that I never got a picture of me in teacher clothes because clearly I'll be wearing sweats for the rest of my life, right Ty? 

Peace and Blessings!

*Names have been changed because I'm not really sure where these stories fall on the confidentiality spectrum. 

Almost Alive Still

You may have noticed our absence the last little while. We're heading into the last stretch of school for awhile and we've been exhausted. It's a very overwhelming feeling to know that after December 7th, I don't have to go to school ever again. 

I am a Math Teacher so it's not likely but knowing that's an option is just a little bit scary. 

Like I said, we're exhausted, over worked and sleep deprived but we've never been happier. 

Happy Holidays my lovelies! 

I am my mother

I knew this day would come. 

The day where I'm teaching and all the sudden I can't take it anymore and I unleash my rage on unsuspecting students.  

Which also happens to be the day where I also fully embarrass myself in front of my class {on purpose} to further my students' education. 

What happened today? The whole range of emotion. That's what. It's amazing I didn't pull a Kristen Bell and start crying. I was dang close. 

One of my classes was ridiculously rowdy. I just assigned a new seating chart and because of that I learned of a new combination of students that should never be within a 100 ft radius from each other. I had to ask these students to stop talking roughly a .... blah blah blah. It was a bad day. I was unraveling. I used the word "inappropriate" more than anyone ever should and one student asked me if I was having a good day to which I lied and said it was great and then he asked if the class was making it hard to maintain my "good day." I had another student ask if I would change her seat because the naughty students mentioned above were stealing her things and bothering her like crazy. I told her i'd fix the problem and then the bell rang. 

And then what did I do? I walked into the hallway where I found two students hurling a football as hard as they could at each other. And then I bee-lined to the closest child, shoved my index finger straight in his face and said through my teeth complete with fire in my eyes, "You. No." I think it was the voice of Voldemort. 

Then I went to the faculty lounge, basically pulled my hair out and said, "Oh crap. I am my mother."

And on the other end of the spectrum, another one of my classes was dead. Check them for a pulse. Poke them with a stick. Dead. So I did what any teacher would. 

I pretended I was Ellen starting her show and I played "Call Me Maybe" and danced up and down the aisles, clapping and trying to get everyone to join in. Once I decided I didn't care what forty 14 year olds thought of me, I really got into it. After which, I gave them a 2 minute break because I was winded.

Oh crap. I am my mother. 

Birthday Week

I know your birthday is only supposed to be one day but mine is always a week long event. I'm a lucky girl like that. With my family being so spread out, the cards and packages just trickle in and I LOVE IT.

{Giant Kit Kat Bar from Jen. So freaking cool! and delicious too}

However, I don't even need gifts. I love my birthday. I just love the day. I wake up hyper. The night before, I go to sleep hyper. I just can't help getting giddy. Even though this is the 24th time I've been through this, it never gets old.

{The Whole Gang!! Jaron and Emily, Cami, Scotty, Conner and Alissa, Amy and Rachel, Alli , and my love Ty}

And to top it all off, I got to spend my birthday weekend with some of my nearest and dearest. My in laws threw me a little shindig on Sunday and then we had some of my family and friends over on Monday night for cake and ice cream. Then my Washington fam called on Facetime and sang to me. Almost as good as actually being with them. Almost.

{The lovely Joanifer}

My fave birthday presents were 1) My niece's babysitter telling my sister that said niece kept saying, "Happy Birthday Emy! Emy's Birthday Today!" and 2) Ty sitting on the side of the bed, in the dark wee morning hours with his arm around me singing Happy Birthday to me. So cute!

{Love this sweet boy}